A personal story

A Personal Story
I would be the most ungrateful person to still breathe if I closed off this book without sharing my personal story — a story so close to my heart, and the greatest inspiration to my writing.

At the start of the book, I talk about how the events that happened in my life almost disqualified me from writing on the subject of encouragement. I believe that was the devil’s doing. He is a liar, and he wanted me to believe that I couldn’t write about something that would later be for my freedom and others’. I have been encouraged by many people under different circumstances many times. I guess that’s enough to qualify me. Paul, the Apostle, says:

Blessed [gratefully praised and adored] be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of mercies and the God of all comfort, who comforts and encourages us in every trouble so that we will be able to comfort and encourage those who are in any kind of trouble, with the comfort with which we ourselves are comforted by God. (2 Corinthians 1:3-4, The Amplified Bible).

I was raised by a single mother. I’m the last born of five from mom and the second-last born of eight from my father. Confused? That’s not strange in Africa. Mom worked so hard to put food on the table, clothes on our bodies, and to give us a decent education among other things.

It was in 1992 during a Sunday school class at a local church we attended when an announcement that would impact my life forever was made. Talk about opportunities and being in the right place at the right time.
A certain gentleman I got to know later as Uncle Joseph Musaalo from the Compassion International Uganda office came to talk about a sponsorship program for children whose parents could not afford to pay school fees. It was not limited to orphaned children alone, but to all who were needy.

On a set date, our pictures and details were captured and taken. I couldn’t make sense of what was going on then, but I remember everything like yesterday. I put on my best clothes– clothes you would wear only on Easter or Christmas day. It was a beautiful day.
I saw guardians, mostly mothers and grandparents crying out of joy. I was enrolled at age six into Nakasero Child Development Center. That’s when I started going to school. A miracle had just happened for me and my family.

The greatest miracle was about to happen, something that would change my life forever. Saturdays were center days at the project premises for all the children on the program. We met at All Saints Cathedral Nakasero for different activities.
One of the main activities was bible study through which I got to hear about the love of God. I was deeply convinced that God loved me so much and wanted the best life for me. I accepted His love and I got born again in 1998.

There’s nothing greater for me than to know God and His Son Jesus Christ. It is the best relationship I know and wish for everyone I meet. Whenever I have a chance to stop at All Saints Cathedral, I’m reminded that my life started there.
I don’t know where I’d be today if God had not saved me. He changed me and gave my life meaning. God’s love has given me a purpose to live for. What love! What a life!
Through the program, I got a sponsor, Rebecca Cipra from Australia. We communicated to each other through letter writing. A few years later she got married to Joseph Freeborn, and together they continued to sponsor my education as a family until I graduated from the university.
We have never met physically. I have never seen them, except in pictures. But they are by far the most generous people I know in my life. If you know where they are, please let them know how much I appreciate them.

With mly little friend selling toys in China

Your words, time, actions, counsel, generosity, life, and whatever you have to offer can become another person’s story of encouragement. Don’t hold it back. I get to do this whenever and wherever I have opportunity at child development centers and in other communities.
Who do you need to encourage on their journey? Reach out to them. Compassion International through Mr. and Mrs. Freeborn did that for my education. I was released from poverty in Jesus’name. Today I’m able to do the same for atleast two others.
When I was out of employment, evicted from a rented house, and found refuge under the roof of a music studio room, Ssonko Wilson reached out to me and invited me to work with him in China.
And most importantly, when I was lost and dead in sin awaiting eternal damnation in hell, God through His Son saved me and gave me eternal life. I am convinced that nothing can separate me from the love of God that I have in Christ Jesus. This is why I love to encourage others.

Life skills training at Soroti CDC

Words create worlds

The wisest king who ever lived on the face of the earth wrote: “Death and life are in the power of the tongue, and those who love it will eat of its fruit.” (Proverbs 18:21). 
As a king, Solomon had so many people approach him for counsel and guidance. This is why among many things, he sought and asked God for wisdom (2Chronicles 1:10).

Fellow kings and leaders from other nations, near and far also came to see him and to ask him some tough questions and no one left his presence with an unanswered question.  
This tells us that the king must have spent a great deal of time speaking to individuals and groups with words.

I believe that by the time he wrote the eighteenth chapter of the book of Proverbs, he had seen the effect of words on the life of any and everyone he ministered to. That’s the power of words. As you read through the entire chapter, you will find that king Solomon talks more about the words of one’s mouth and the fruit of their lips.

The use of words is one of the most powerful tools on earth. God used words to create the universe. In a similar sense, words inspire the creative ability of man. 

Cultures and societies that have embraced this indispensable force know how to call greatness out of their children. They use words of encouragement to raise their esteem, foster talents and boost their academic performance.

Yehuda Berg, a Jewish author, says: “Words are singularly the most powerful force available to humanity. We can choose to use this force constructively with words of encouragement, or destructively using words of despair. Words have energy and power with the ability to help, to heal, to hinder, to hurt, to harm, to humiliate, and to humble.”

Many people are compelled to give voice to any passing feeling, thought, or impression they have. They randomly dump the contents of their mind without regard to the significance of what they are saying.

Paul, the Apostle, warns: “Let no corrupt word proceed out of your mouth, but what is good for necessary edification, that it may impart grace to the hearers.” (Ephesians 4:29)

In his book, ‘Love as a Way of Life,’ Gary Chapman uses a vivid metaphor for words as being either ‘bullets or seeds’. If we use our words as seeds with a feeling of supportiveness and sincere goodwill, we can rebuild a relationship in positive and life-affirming ways.

Do I need to explain how bullets in a gun work?  

For more on this, check out my book- Lift Up! Building relationships and influencing others through encouragement.

Words and medicine

Anxiety in a man’s heart weighs it down, But a good (encouraging) word makes it glad. (Proverbs 12:25, The Amplified Bible).

Many things weigh people’s hearts down, some for a moment and others for a considerable length of time. Anxiety is one of the worst things anyone can have. Anxiety causes depression. Medical research reveals that depression claims more lives than several common diseases annually.  

Simply put, depression is a mental health disorder that can affect the daily life of a person. Conditions that can get worse due to depression include arthritis, asthma, cardiovascular diseases, cancer, diabetes, obesity. Below is an extract from the World Health Organisation (WHO) report 2021 on depression. 

Depression is a common illness worldwide, with more than 264 million people affected. Depression is different from usual mood fluctuations and short-lived emotional responses to challenges in everyday life.  
Especially when long-lasting and with moderate or severe intensity, depression may become a serious health condition. It can cause the affected person to suffer greatly and function poorly at work, at school, and in the family.  

At its worst, depression can lead to suicide. Close to 800 000 people die due to suicide every year. Suicide is the second leading cause of death in 15-29-year-olds. (World Health Organization) 

Some people use natural remedies, such as herbal medicines, to treat mild to moderate depression. A doctor may prescribe antidepressants. They aim to correct chemical imbalances of neurotransmitters in the brain that are believed to be responsible for changes in mood and behavior.  

The most common types used are SNRIs and SSRIs. These, like many medicines, may have health-damaging side effects which include hypoglycemia, or low blood sugar, low sodium, nausea, rash, dry mouth, constipation or diarrhea, weight loss, sweating, tremor, sedation, sexual dysfunction, insomnia, headache, dizziness, anxiety and agitation, abnormal thinking, to mention but a few.

No medicine gives better treatment for depression than words of encouragement. Words give life. Words give hope. Words frame worlds. One word of encouragement will sustain life longer than hundreds of packets of drugs.  

The writer in the book of proverbs 16:24 adds: “Pleasant words are like a honeycomb, Sweetness to the soul and health to the bones.”  
Words play a vital part in treatment for most, if not all, of the sicknesses we suffer from.

Counseling and Psychotherapy (also known as talk therapy) are services offered at different medical facilities for mental health purposes.  
The sessions conducted are word interactions between the therapist and the patient. Depending on the relationship between the two, or as the relationship improves, the patient is encouraged to develop their solutions with time. That’s the power of words.   

Excerpt from my book, Lift Up! Building relationships and influencing others through encouragement.

Everything that has breath

During my senior six vacations, I was compelled to start teaching children at our local church Sunday
school. The class was comprised of children between ages three and twelve. My little experience dealing with children was greatly challenged in the first meeting but I persevered.

Later on, I found two other volunteers that loved to work with children, and we split the group into three classes for easy learning: 3-5’s, 6-9’s, and 10-12’s. I took on the 10-12’s.

One of the girls in my class had just come from Rwanda to study upper primary school (grade six) in
Uganda. She was a teenager then but had been demoted to a lower class (grade 4) because she could not speak English well.
She was always quiet in the Sunday school class because she did not want anyone laughing at her broken speech in the English language. I guess she had tried speaking up in school and was embarrassed.

I made every effort to get her to talk during the bible study, tried calling her by name to garner some sort of response from her, but it was all in vain. I later found out that she couldn’t speak English comfortably.

I don’t remember saying much to her but she always smiled when I talked to her. She got involved
in other activities like dance and sports where she wasn’t forced to speak, and she always performed well.

She eventually learned how to speak English and completed primary school. A few years later, her family
moved to Canada where she joined college and continued with her studies. She is a practicing nurse in
Canada today.

Everyone needs encouragement. It’s that word, look, or note that says, “I notice you, I care about you, and
what you’re doing is significant – it matters.”

How do you identify someone who needs
encouragement? That person is breathing – Samuel Truett Cathy

Excerpt from the book Lift Up! Building relationships and influencing others through encouragement.

Fruitfulness

God’s will for all creation is fruitfulness. Fruitfulness is the result of a good discipling relationship. Fruitfulness is what God commanded and expects from every living thing, including man (Genesis 1:22,28). He wants us to be productive and subdue the earth. That’s influence. 

Yet, in His love, God has not left us to figure it out on our own.  
Jesus explicitly describes and illustrates this process in John 15: 

“I am the true vine, and My Father is the vinedresser. Every branch in Me that does not bear fruit He takes away; and every branch that bears fruit He prunes, that it may bear more fruit. You are already clean because of the word which I have spoken to you. Abide in Me, and I in you. As the branch cannot bear fruit of itself, unless it abides in the vine, neither can you, unless you abide in Me.” (John 15:1-4, Emphasis mine).  

There are differing opinions from different bible scholars about what happens to the branch that does not bear fruit. Some have related it to the coming judgment when Jesus returns. This group of people says that such a branch represents non-believers. Another category of people say that the branch represents Christians who stop believing and fall away from the truth.

From an agricultural perspective, the picture that Jesus used in most of His parables, that kind of branch is usually inhibited from bearing fruit not because it does not want to, but because the circumstances have forced it to stay on the ground where it cannot bear fruit from. 

“He takes away” in this case means He lifts up the branch. In other words, He takes away the branch from the ground that it may bear fruit. That’s what God does to us when we are down and out. He lifts us. He comforts us. He encourages us. He cleanses us by His word. He causes us to become productive again.

Fruitfulness is guaranteed as long as we continue to abide in Christ. We cannot be as productive outside that union. It is through this fellowship with the word that our minds are renewed by the truth and we are set free (John 8:31-32).

If anyone does not abide in Me, he is cast out as a branch and is withered; and they gather them and throw them into the fire, and they are burned. If you abide in Me, and My words abide in you, you will ask what you desire, and it shall be done for you. (John 15:6-7) 

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Excerpt from Lift Up! Building relationships and influencing others through encouragement.

Help them win

Lift Up!_book cover

Everyone, regardless of their status in society, needs encouragement. Every person at their lowest needs
another person to lift them up. Encouragement is the silent force behind any individual’s success.

A lot of people have gone further than they thought they could because someone else thought
they could – Zig Ziglar.

There are many ways in which one person can encourage another. These include positive words,
presence, time, generosity, motivation, and trust.
Encouragement is one of the strongest forces that benefits both the receiver and the giver.

Joel Osteen said, “We weren’t designed to go through
life alone. If we want to move forward, we’re going to have to link arms with one another. Make time to encourage the people in your life. As you encourage others, you will be strengthened and empowered.”

The generous soul will be made rich, and He who waters will also be watered himself. (Proverbs 11:25).
Studies of the human nervous system have also validated what’s written in the book of Proverbs. Some organic chemicals and hormones are released by the brain as messengers between nerve cells.

One such chemical is dopamine. Dopamine functions both as a hormone and a neurotransmitter,
and plays several important roles in the brain and body.
In popular culture and media, dopamine is usually seen as the main chemical of pleasure. It signals the perceived motivational prominence. It is involved in reward, motivation, attention, and even regulating body movements.
When dopamine is released in large amounts, it creates feelings of pleasure and reward, which motivates you to repeat a specific behavior.

It is important to note that several diseases of the nervous system are associated with dysfunctions of the
dopamine system. (Wikipedia contributors. 2021)

Another important chemical released by the body is serotonin. It is sometimes called the happy chemical because it contributes to the feelings of well-being and
happiness. This happens when you do something good for another person. Depression has been linked to low levels of serotonin. (Hormone Health Network)

You may be asking yourself, “what does dopamine and serotonin have to do with lifting others? Well,
the power to encourage another person is in your hand. You have what it takes to increase the dopamine levels of another person and the serotonin levels of your own.

Think of someone who has been an encouragement to you. Follow their example and do the same for someone you know. Don’t hesitate. Do it today and make a difference in someone’s life, and you will be glad you stretched your hand out to lift them. Help them win and
you too will win.

You can have everything in life you want if you will
just help enough other people get what they want – Zig Ziglar.

Excerpt from Lift Up! Building relationships and influencing others through encouragement

Generosity-the best life lived

Now the multitude of those who believed were of one heart and one soul; neither did anyone say that any of the things he possessed was his own, but they had all things in common.   
And with great power, the apostles gave witness to the resurrection of the Lord Jesus. And great grace was upon them all. Nor was there anyone among them who lacked; for all who were possessors of lands or houses sold them, and brought the proceeds of the things that were sold, and laid them at the apostles’ feet; and they distributed to each as anyone had need. 
And Joses, who was also named Barnabas by the apostles (which is translated Son of Encouragement), a Levite of the country of Cyprus, having land, sold it, and brought the money and laid it at the apostles’ feet. (Acts 4:32-37 Emphasis mine). 

This portion of scripture reveals the character and effects of generous living among any group of people. Five things stand out.

1. Generous people are of one heart and soul. They don’t see others as potential threats or competitors but as partners. Their sense of security does not come from the things they possess, but in the relationships they maintain. 

2. Generous people have all things in common. They recognize that every good and perfect gift comes from God. They acknowledge that freely have they received, and so freely do they give. They understand that life is not just about their satisfaction. They have pleasure in sharing what they get with others. 

3. Generous people display God’s power and grace upon them in everything they do. For God loves, takes pleasure in, prizes above other things, and is unwilling to abandon or to do without a cheerful giver. It is the generous people that advance God’s kingdom on earth. 
And God is able to make all grace abound toward you, that you, always having all sufficiency in all things, may have an abundance for every good work. (2 Corinthians 9:8). 

4. Generous people envision a world in which no one lacks. They delight in meeting the needs of others. Their desire is for everyone to prosper. They care about the welfare of those they live among.  

5. Generous people ‘give to encourage’. Barnabas was such a person. Barnabas was not even his real name. His name was Joses (Joseph in other translations) from Cyprus. We are told that the Apostles called him Barnabas because it means Son of Encouragement. He sold a property and brought the proceedings to the Apostles to encourage them in the work of building the church. 

The ministry of presence

Our nine-month-old son fell sick and we took him to the hospital for a medical check. We thought the visit would take a couple of hours, and then return home with some medicine maybe.  
We didn’t carry any food or extra clothes because we thought we would be back home shortly.

After several tests and examinations of the boy, the doctor admitted us. My wife and I would have to stay in the hospital for a few days.  
We called a few friends to tell them about the situation, and they extended their sympathies and prayers for our baby.

We did not expect anyone to visit us in the hospital because the times were hard, with everyone trying to stay within the confinement of their homes due to the Covid-19 restrictions. 
A friend of mine, Dora who had planned to visit us at home that day, got the news halfway on her journey and she decided to come straight to the hospital where we were. She asked if we had eaten or needed anything. We sure needed food and some clothes.

She immediately jumped on a motorbike to her place to prepare some food and brought it with some clothes and beddings for us to use. She brought us breakfast the following day and kept checking on us until we left the hospital.  
She drove with us home and returned to her place after. We were super encouraged by her presence with us throughout that time. That’s the ministry of presence.  

We live in a time when everything seems to run so fast. We find ourselves running against time. We live life like we are trying to catch up with things that have long gone. Our lives are so busy. We want everything fast—fast foods, drive fast, learn fast (in other words don’t think), marry fast, and so on. But no one says to another, “die fast.”

We rarely sit down to enjoy a meal. Work and school-going people in China have breakfast on the go. You pick something to eat from the street and jump on the bus.  
We would rather drive while texting.

Multi-tasking is now esteemed as a skill that could get you ahead of others on a job. As a result, one cannot even stop for a moment and just listen to the other person. While one is still talking, another goes ahead to complete their sentence whether they know the story or not. 

Answering before listening is both stupid and rude. (Proverbs 18:13, The Message Bible). Slow down. Be present. 

Taken from the book Lift Up! Building relationships and influencing others through encouragement

Attitude is everything

To the person being challenged, your attitude is your best friend. The person challenging you wants the best for you, otherwise they have no business talking to you. They cannot change you. Granted. No one can. They believe that the power to change you is in you for you.

Skilled people have a tendency of feeling like they know it all- that no one can add to their knowledge. Attitude is more important than skill because we need to be humble in order to be teachable. It’s okay to be green about something but have a teachable attitude because green things grow, but ripe things rot.

How do you receive a rebuke from a friend? How do you respond to criticism? Every time you think you know something, know that there will always be someone who knows it better. It will change the way you think and operate if you will humbly receive them. 

A wise man will hear and increase learning, and a man of understanding will attain wise counsel. (Proverbs 1:5). 

See how the ministry of Apollos was transformed below: 
Now a certain Jew named Apollos, born at Alexandria, an eloquent man and mighty in the Scriptures came to Ephesus. This man had been instructed in the way of the Lord; and being fervent in spirit, he spoke and taught accurately the things of the Lord, though he knew only the baptism of John. So he began to speak boldly in the synagogue.  
When Aquila and Priscilla heard him, they took him aside and explained to him the way of God more accurately. And when he desired to cross to Achaia, the brethren wrote, exhorting the disciples to receive him; and when he arrived, he greatly helped those who had believed through grace; for he vigorously refuted the Jews publicly, showing from the Scriptures that Jesus is the Christ. (Acts 18:24-28 Emphasis mine). 

Your encourager is not superior to you because they are challenging you. Football coaches are not better footballers than the players on their teams. There are not many coaches who were superstars during their time of playing.  
School teachers are not pilots, doctors, engineers, lawyers, businessmen, or farmers. They are simply guides that make the best of all professionals.

Your encourager sees the best you can become and wants to lead you in that direction.  
If you want to go fast, travel alone. But if you want to go far, travel with someone. Get a coach. They will keep you accountable for achieving your goals.  

Your faith life matters

God’s word is an encourager in the time of trouble. It’s not always going to be easy, and that’s why your faith-life matters. Faith is a confidence in God’s ability to perform His good word.   
After He had spoken to His disciples about many things, Jesus said: 

“These things I have spoken to you, that in Me you may have peace. In the world, you will have tribulation, but be of good cheer, I have overcome the world.” (John 16:33).

From the time He predicted and told them about His coming death, Jesus had been preparing his disciples, warning them of the things that would happen after His departure.  

We live in a fallen world and as a result, we suffer from many things—poverty, sickness, bad governance, pandemics, wars, name it.  Despite all these, God promised never to leave us nor forsake us.  
Because of His great love, He gave Jesus, His Son to save the world. He is the greater power in a boisterous universe. He is the perfect peace within a storm. He is the way, the truth, and the life. Therefore we must believe in Him.

“Let not your heart be troubled; you believe in God, believe also in Me.” (John 14:1) 
Having faith in God does not guarantee that our lives will be trouble-proof. Faith in God will strengthen us to overcome.

For whatever is born of God overcomes the world. And this is the victory that has overcome the world— our faith. (1John 5:4).  

And we know that all things work together for good to those who love God, to those who are the called according to His purpose. (Romans 8:28).

Faith is our response to what God has already done by His grace. God has already provided all the love, joy, peace, forgiveness, healing, and every good thing we will ever need. We receive all this and more by faith— trusting in His provision.

Because it is vital for our relationship with God, we must be growing in faith. How?  
Read and meditate in the word of God. Listen to tapes and teachers of the word (You will know them by their fruits). 
So then faith comes by hearing and hearing by the word of God. (Romans 10:17).

Pray. Prayer is communication with God. Let your life be punctuated by moments of praise, petitions, and thanksgiving to God in prayer. Prayer is total dependence on God and His power to perform.  
But you, beloved, building yourselves up on your most holy faith, praying in the Holy Spirit (Jude 1:20).